


Actually-An-Ant Person

by Egill_Atlason



Category: Ant-Man (Comics), Ant-Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:54:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27726467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Egill_Atlason/pseuds/Egill_Atlason
Summary: What if superheroes had powers that did exactly what they said they do? In this debut issue of Actually-An-Ant Person, the titular character fights his nemesis: Doctor Grift.This is a preview from a collection of parodies I wrote titled "Fantabulous Fan Fiction: edited for copyright reasons." Available now onAmazon
Comments: 3
Kudos: 1





	Actually-An-Ant Person

# Actually-An-Ant Person

FADE IN:

INT. BANK - DAY

Masked assailants are holding a bank hostage. People are huddled on the floor.

PALL ROB, in full ACTUALLY-AN-ANT PERSON gear, on his first mission since his wife died, steps through door.

ROBBER NR. 1  
Don’t come any closer Actually-An-Ant  
Person, or I’ll blow this lady’s head off,  
just like I did your wife’s.

PALL ROB  
That can’t be, my doctor said  
she died in a skiing accident.

ROBBER NR. 1 takes off his mask to reveal the face of DOCTOR GRIFT.

DOCTOR GRIFT  
It seems you have been duped.  
I pretended to be your doctor to  
trick you into thinking your  
wife died in a skiing accident.

PALL ROB  
(visibly shocked)  
Doctor Grift, does this mean –

DOCTOR GRIFT  
Yes. There IS something  
wrong with your prostate.

PALL ROB  
I should have known.  
You will pay for this.

PALL ROB reaches for the big red button on his belt, the one that turns him into Actually-An-Ant Person. A flash of light goes off as he transforms.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. FOREST – DAY

In a forest clearing stands an ant hill surrounded by ants scouring for food.

PAN TO ANT NR. 1

ANT NR. 1 skitters along the ground, until he comes up to a luscious raspberry easily four times his size. Even so, he picks it up as if it were nothing.

DAVID ANTENBOROUGH  
The ant is happy with his catch  
and returns to the anthill.

Once in the anthill, ANT NR. 1 traverses the intricate underground system that is his home, until he reaches the queen’s lair.

DAVID ANTENBOROUGH  
Our ant is in the presence of  
royalty. But all is well, as he  
is a competent servant.

A loud beeping sound comes from the belly of ANT NR. 1. The sound grows louder and faster, until ANT NR.1 transforms into PALL ROB and completely destroys the ant hill.

PALL ROB  
Not again.


End file.
